Wedding Traditions and the Meanings

Ever wonder why we have such traditions of cake cutting, garter and even bouquet tossing to single ladies. And here are the histories of such traditions.

Cake Cutting

Ancient Romans as a symbol of her fertility bake cakes made of wheat or barley and break it over the bride’s head. In its earliest origins, the unmarried young women attending the wedding were expected to scramble for the grains to ensure their own betrothals, much as they do today for the bridal bouquet.

As time passed, it became traditional to stack cakes atop one another. The bride and groom then asked to kiss over on top and if they won’t stumble the cake means a lifetime of good fortune was certain for the new couple. During the reign of King Charles II of England, it became routine for cake to become edible palace iced with sugar.

Garter and Bouquet Toss

During the 14th century, it was expected for the bride to throw her garter to the men, but men got too drunk and become impatient and try to take the garter off her ahead of time. Eventually groom got into the scene and saved his dear bride from the uncontrollable mass. It is less trouble for bride to toss her bridal bouquet instead.

Wine/Champagne Toast

Wine has been used for celebration ever since. Wine has imply life, strength, love, and a life of prosperity. Drinking wine from a common cup has been the intimate mark of deep sharing. “Entwined as the Vine. . . .” It is also in remembrance of Jesus turning the water into Wine as his first miracle at the Wedding of Cana in Galilee. It can be celebrated intimately during the Ceremony between the bride & groom or it can be at the Reception or both.

Eating wedding cake and wine toast is the origin of the Wedding Eucharist matrimonial wherein a portion of the ceremony is giving each other a sup from the Cup of Love and to eat from the Bread of Life and Health.

We call it a “toast” when we drink to someone because of an old French custom in which a piece of bread was put in the bottom of the wine cup (for flavor).

Dove Release

For century’s releasing dove was a part of wedding couples as symbols of their everlasting love for one another.  Color of doves symbolizes purity – that both Bride and Groom are pure to each other – they are honest and open, beginning their lives as one “from this day forward.”  And as doves choose one partner and mate for life. Doves flying home together, symbolizes couple starting off on their journey together to start their own. Some cultures believe if a couple see a white dove on their wedding day is a sign of good luck and good fortune that will last throughout their marriage.

I LOVE YOU LOLA FOREVER

Last Nov 10, 2011, I woke up a bit early than usual because my Tita Bebeth texted me to drop by at Lola’s house before I go to work to check Lola Toyang;s sugar because it abruptly dropped again. At around 830am I left the house and went to Lola took her sugar and it was 314 already so I was confident that my Lola will be fine. I talked to her and reminded her to eat or else I will insert Intravenous Fluids as ordered by my doctor brother. My Lola answered back “oo” then asked me “San ka pupunta?” I answered back “Papasok sa work”, then I left.

 After 40 minutes my cousin called and said my Lola’s gone. At work I cried pale of tears. I texted my mom, I think Lola waited for me because I always says that she will wait until my wedding because she will attend the event and I will buy her beautiful dress. I felt that she bid goodbye to me and saying can’t be on your wedding so she waited for me before she die. I am so sad but need to uplift myself because I am at work. 

Then the 6 mourning days passed, November 15, 2011 was the day to lead Lola to her last resting place. Tita Mely asked me to share speech about my Lola. And here are the words from my heart:

Today we say goodbye to someone whose love was and is so important in our lives-Lola Toyang. Her life was one that touched each of us in special ways. Her whole life she loved her family and served them well. Together with granpa they brought up five wonderful children. Grandma shared their kids' joy as she welcomed 5 grandchildren and only one great-grandchild. She had lots of friends and shared in their happiness.

As we look back on how Lola Toyang touched our lives, we each embrace our special memories of her. We remember how she would love to play with her kids and her grandkids and especially with Migo. We remember how she always made sure that everyone who enters the door eat ... and always asked "Kumain ka na". We remember how much she loved to talk with us, and how her smile would positively glow as she listens to what story I am telling. She shared our joys.

We remember her always reading the bible on the doorstep, walking around the subdivision and watching baseball games with umbrella on her one hand.

We remember how she was always glad to see us, how she would welcome us, then say "San Kayo galling?” at “San ka pupunta?" and this was the last words I heard from my Lola because I am the last person who visited her. She would then say “Kumain kana dyan”. Every time I talked with her, she’s saying “mag-asawa ka na”.  I always tease Lola of me going to have my baby for her to see and always saying to her that she will be attending my wedding and I will buy her beautiful dress. But unfortunately she can’t be physically present anymore. But the whole mourning days I always said that Lola will be in the picture for sure beside me and Tic.

 I also remember how my dad loves her so much and how she love my dad. Lola stayed with us when my dad was ill. And my mom always says she’s a very kind and loving mother in-law. She helped my mom in her own ways when my dad passed away.

We remember how she prayed for us and how her prayers are with us now. When something came up and we didn’t know how to deal with she always advice - to pray on it. Her faith and devotion to the Lord, I believe she has found Eternal Rest with our Lord.

I remember her hope to her kids, grandkids and her great-grandkid, that we would find happiness in our lives, that we would grow to be good and loving people. I know that she’s not disappointed in any of us. She was so proud to see all of us together steady. So happy to hear our delight as we remembered what about her we treasured so much.

You can see the optimism she has given us, when among the tears we shed, there was so much gratefulness and so joy that she had brought into our lives. You can see the faith she shared, as we gather here to commend her spirit into the trusted arms of our Loving God for eternity. You can see, most of all, the love she gave without end and tirelessly to all of us, in that we come together today and remember her.

And so Lola Toyang’s life was one of faith, of optimism, and of love. The greatest souvenir that she gave us was her love. We love you, Lola. We will miss you. And we will always remember you. I love you Lola

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While reading my message to Lola my tears are flooding continuously. Felt bad that we lost her. But after listening to my Tita Nescie’s message I felt good and better that my Lola’s not anymore with us because I heard from Tita how painful his sufferings which was not mentioned to me as her nurse at home. I salute Lola because she can handle the pain even though it’s killing her, she keep on hiding to herself all the pain. After hearing that I felt good that now she has no suffering that she’s happy wherever she is right now. She’s together with my dad and my Lolo. I’m happy that she not experiencing further pain. I felt light and thankful to the lord for ending her grievances. You will always be on my prayer. I love you Lola Toyang.